Remember my post, full of woe and self-pity, about how I wanted just one day to myself, just one day without small children lining up and solemnly watching me as I sit on the john. Well, I got it. I got THREE!
TTD, the wonderful, wonderful man, has taken the boys to his folks' place in NW Iowa for three whole days. Three days! Granted, I spent twelve hours of one day in the ER, but still, the rest of the time, I have had the house to myself! To myself! The house! And my time! Oh my word, the time! There is so much of it! Also the exclamation points! Really (obviously) it is all too much.
Not that I don't miss them. Of course I miss them. But since I know they're coming back, I can enjoy silence, and sleep, and oh, did I mention the time? I feel like I'm floating around in this big, still pool of time. I can do something, like make bread, slowly and without interruption, and then I can stop. Then I can do something else, like laundry or yoga, and then stop. I can get so much done, and still have all the time in the world to just sit on the back steps and stare at the falling leaves and my fat cats, who live like this every day. I feel like there's room in my brain. It's a very good feeling. It's an astonishing feeling. It's like something in the middle of my chest has let go and relaxed. Like I've just left downtown Manhattan at rush hour for the silence of the prairies around the Rez. Like, hmm, I'm a little stoned?
So yes, this is good, and I am very grateful. I was feeling a little desperate there, and now I feel like I can go on again.
Of course, there's another reason I can go on, and that is The Iowa Hawkeye Marching Band, which is now practicing, ad infinitum, a medly from Phantom of the Opera.